Mediation solicitors

Mediation is a process that focuses on communication between separating parties and fosters an environment in which decisions can be reached mutually. This is beneficial for many couples and helps build a solid communication foundation for moving forward, particularly where the exes need to maintain a co-parenting relationship.

Mediation is an opportunity to build long-term communication foundations and talk about the unique issues facing you in your situation. The family court cannot help with personal aspects, so mediation is key for support to develop systems you can use going forward where there will not be a legal framework to guide you.

The Family Justice System is keen to keep couples out of court. This will help reduce the pressure on the family courts, but ensure each case is dealt with in a caring and tailored way. Various forms of non-court dispute resolution (NCDR) are available, and there are multiple options within mediation itself to suit the needs of the individuals.

No, mediation is not compulsory, although strongly encouraged where appropriate.

Attending a Mediation Information and Assessment meeting is compulsory, unless you fit one of the exemption criteria as defined by the Family Procedure Rules. At this meeting, your case’s suitability for mediation will be assessed.

Find out more about the Family Procedure Rules.

Whilst your circumstances are unique, there is a general structured process involved in mediation. This usually looks like the following:

1. Initial appointment: Known as the MIAM, a mediator will meet with the person who made the initial contact, for an individual meeting discussing the appropriateness of mediation for their situation. The mediator will assess the suitability of the dispute for mediation. At this meeting, the next steps will be discussed, and there will be an opportunity to discuss the costs, plan, and what type of mediation would be best. Your ex-partner will likely be invited to an initial meeting, one-on-one with the mediator.
2. Both you and your ex must agree to participate in mediation and sign an agreement that sets out the process, and confidentiality.
3. There may be things you need to do to prepare for your mediation sessions. Please see below.
4. Your mediation session will look different depending on what kind of mediation you opt for. However, the first session will involve the mediator explaining the rules and structure and working out an agenda with the two of you. The mediator will facilitate the negotiation. These sessions usually last two hours, and the number of mediation sessions you need will depend on your situation and how successfully you can come to a mutual decision.
5. If you reach an agreement, the mediator will draft this into a memorandum of understanding, which can then be converted into a legal document by a solicitor.

It is important to think about what you want to get out of the mediation process before you start. Identify the issues which you and your ex-partner are struggling to agree on and make sure to discuss these during the joint meetings. For example, this could be a single issue, such as what to do with the family home, or various concerns around how to split your assets generally.

If you are trying to reach an agreement on issues relating to money or property, you will need to fill out a financial disclosure form. Your mediator will discuss how to do this, and you should also seek legal advice from your mediation support lawyer to ensure any documents and forms are correct.

Mediation sessions are usually 90 minutes.

The number of sessions needed to reach a conclusion depends on your situation. Some people can conclude their negotiations in one session; others may need more. You may also require multiple sessions if you need to discuss both finances and child arrangements, as these will need to be negotiated separately.

Once an agreement has been reached, your mediator will write a ‘memorandum of understanding’. This is a document that confirms your agreement in writing; both parties will receive a copy.

If your agreement is relating to money or property, you should take your memorandum of understanding to a solicitor, who can then draft this into a financial consent order, to be made legally binding by the court.

If mediation has involved child arrangement negotiations, a parenting plan may be drawn up.

If you find that you can’t come to an agreement with your ex-partner, we recommend you talk to a specialist solicitor who can advise you on what to do next.

There are still options for you if you’d rather avoid going to court. For instance, you could consider a ‘collaborative law’ session, where you’ll work with a solicitor to reach an agreement.

You could also try family arbitration. This is where an arbitrator – similar to a judge – will come to their own decision on the things you and your ex-partner can’t agree on.

Due to changes to the Family Procedure Rules in April 2024, divorcing couples will need to set out their views on non-court dispute resolution, including mediation, in open correspondence. The idea is for couples to genuinely consider alternative dispute resolution, rather than heading straight for court.

Mediation is not compulsory, but you will need to prove why you are unable to take part in it. You can no longer refuse to attend without good cause.

If your ex still refuses to consider mediation, seek legal advice.

There are different types of mediation that cater for separating couples in different situations, including shuttle mediation where parties do not need to meet face-to-face. However, mediation may not be appropriate if your relationship was abusive or in some other situations.

A good mediator will assess your suitability for mediation. Seek legal assistance if you are unsure.